Abusive sociopaths will repeatedly apologize for their abuse but then go right on ahead and continue to abuse their targets without remorse consideration or empathy. For an abusive sociopath the words “sorry” or “apology” have absolutely zero meaning or real practical function in reality. Whereas when normal people say that they are “sorry”, they recognize that their actions do cause others significant harm and as a result their troubled sensitivity or conscience compels them to cease the abuse onto those affected by the abusive actions. But abusers just don’t give a shit; their words mean nothing. There is no room for improvement as they are already without fault in their own eyes, and that’s enough for them; other people who are affected by their abuse simply do not matter. It is more important for them to expose their targets to their abuse rather than place the target of abuse, the man or woman of authentic value, above the abuse (obviously; hey, abusers might be the most vile form of human being running around out there but they have their priorities strait). And what do abusers do when their targets speak up against the abuse? SUPPRESS FREEDOM OF SPEECH OR EXPRESSION. NAZI CONCENTRATION CAMP SETUP 101. They claim that “there is no problem” and go on abusing those targets even more by physically intimidating them, violating them, shunning them, gaslight them, manipulate them, hurt them, slander them, accuse and judge them, forcibly coerce them into contracts that are not in their best interest (duress), presume them guilty before being found innocent, stalk and follow them, lie and cheat, and most importantly: appear as civil and as kind and as reasonable as possible — but only while others are watching.
Abusers want to break you down and render you helpless and disfunctional; their aim is YOUR self-confidence. Lovely pair of eyes there, huh? They want you to perceive yourself as they perceive you: as worthless, shameful, incapable, dirty or vile, unacceptable, underserving: a scapegoat for THEIR evils and hate and anger issues concerning their own obsession with the illusion of perfectionism, essentially. They want you to feel guilty; that you are ‘wrong’; that you are ‘bad’; that you have a ‘mental problem’, even when there is hardly much wrong with you, if at all — they take great satisfaction in this. It has been said that we can judge the character of a man or a woman by the manner in which they choose to treat animals, but with an abuser people actually become less important than animals, and animals become less important than objects… perhaps worthy of making a profit, but that’s about it. As a good friend once mentioned to me, “Don’t be sorry… Just don’t do it again.” And if we really think about it, that statement has profound meaning and substance, meaning and substance that an abuser will never truly comprehend or put into practice even if their lives depended on it, which, let’s face it… It does.
For example, one fine sunny day while in church an abuser might consider you to be ‘The Best’ because you are willingly participating within the confines of their preferred conditional ‘love’ circus, but the moment that you choose that religion is not for you, you are suddenly considered to have some miraculous form of a ‘mental disease’ bestowed upon you by the grace of their choice of a god. The best allegory I have managed to come up with in order to properly convey the nature of these kinds of abusers is the term Giant Babies; a vivid term which also recalls the pleasant alien creature in the Hollywood film, Aliens (1979). A truly insidiously terrorizing creature, really.
The measure of the likes of an abuser’s joy or reality depends entirely upon the self-doubt and suffering of others; you cannot simply be your own free man or woman — especially when you are NOT a public servant — without the conditional attachments of exterior praise or punishment that abusers have already decided for you way in advance in spite of ethical concerns which not only apply locally but also globally. Hey, we can’t steer the Titanic away from a deadly iceberg or submarine (obviously) using a pair of butterfly wings overnight now, can we? You must conform or be forced to conform to a very limited black and white paradigm. Of course force-fitting anyone who stands out in any way into such a polarity of thought is a sure tell as to the not-so-sophisticated breadth of an abuser’s brain power (in this case, a computing power of 2, but no more; compared to, say, a computing power of 100 or 100, 000). Treating others in this quite limiting manner is like a narcotic drug for the abuser. Its simple (minded) and effective. They have no other means (no pun intended) to feel ‘whole’ or ‘worthy’ than to subject others into feelings of inferiority, rather than simply mind their own goddamn business, keep to themselves, and generate their own self-worth, because in reality they have none or very little at best, and they know it.
Abusers will trick their targets into uneasy situations by either showing up unannounced or in disguise, to initiate unjustified violence upon their targets, spy on them, read their private documents or emails, report their freedom of expression on social media in order to premeditatedly sabotage that freedom of expression by simply assuming the worst in their target’s use of words like, say, ‘faggot‘, when in reality there are many other allegorical applications to this rather fascinating word (remember: abusers project onto others, so we can almost bet our bottom dollar that they will usually tend to assume the worst in any given situation; now isn’t that great?); they will violate the boundary of privacy upon which the honour between healthy individuals depends, and by extension, healthy communities. They will project and call their targets nasty dirty little rotten names, especially behind their targets’ backs, and label those targets in order to force-fit them into the abuser’s very narrow-minded minuscule pathetic little box of perception or judgement, which has little to no scope beyond the abuser’s immediate vicinity.
They will punish you for reaching out for help or even for having fallen in love with them, then they will lie about the fact that they know that you are reaching out for help or that you are in love with them and claim instead that you are acting violent and physically abusive and intimidating towards them with as peaceful of a thing as expressing yourself using… texts (words on a computer screen)! Then pretend like nothing is wrong and that everything is as right as rain in the world, because, hey… abusers are infallible, especially in their own eyes. While being targeted by an abuser, the most important thing for that abuser’s wellbeing is that you suffer and that you continually remain disproportionately treated; if you step out of line one or two steps, they will ensure that you are punished as though you stepped out of line ten or twenty steps, and they are great at acting like sad little helpless victims too, especially if they are gender-favoured by the iron first of the system in which they reign. They will lie and accuse you of being something that you are not, or accuse you of doing or saying something that you did not do or say, and even if you have the right to act differently or defensively due to an unreasonable and unfair treatment towards you, the target, they will not bother to even begin to consider your circumstances or make any real measure of effort to understand your point of view. Instead, they will cram you into a narrow little bird cage in order to claim their own (false) sense of alleged ‘security’ and (false) sense of ‘self-esteem’ or ‘pride’. Heck, they don’t even want you driving on the same public road as they do! They are totally insane, and can barely manage to hold the sensitivity of a piece of shit.
As their target, it is paramount for the abuser that you perceive yourself as somehow ‘wrong’ because this determines their own perception of being ‘right’; they cannot be convinced of their own perception independent from proving you wrong first. Sounds crazy, right? Well, that’s because it is crazy. It matters more to them that they go out of their way to prove that others are wrong rather than simply act independently on their own convictions or observations. They feed off of this like mosquitos feed off of blood: without taking away from an exterior source of energy they simply cannot survive. The fact that they behave in this way is another sure tell that, as their target, you are far more important to them than they are to themselves. This is rather quite sad and pathetic indeed. Should they simply allow you to be, to exist freely, to speak your own original mind, it would be too much for them to bear because you would be the very embodiment of everything that they are not (intelligence, mostly). They simply cannot handle this kind of a living breathing walking reminder, as it causes much too much cognitive dissonance and because they are so concerned with exterior sources of energy they define themselves by everything that others do or have — not by what they choose for themselves. This is a denial mechanism for a brain of lower IQ because deep down inside the abuser’s subconscious mind is in some way aware of the lower quality of their truly horrible roles in society. The true nature of their souls hearts and minds is simply too much for the average human being to process or face up to after living an entire life of denial and mediocre thought. To face this quality of their own stunted growth of character or spirit would be too great a stress to their parameters of what they consider to be reality (‘La La Land’), at the detriment of that reality as well as themselves; like a person who invests all of their beliefs resources money interest and power into the delusional foundations of a house of cards which inevitably crumbles down at once, and themselves along with it. Castles made of sand drift into the sea, eventually. Its sad. But can we blame these Giant Babies for being the giant babies that they are, really? If we are lucky, the abuser will go out of their way to identify with us and accuse us of being the abuser or even better: accuse us of identifying them as the abuser, first! There’s nothing quite like being first.
They will gang up on anyone who or anything that stands out of the status quo while seeking validation from those who share their narrow-minded disease. Like asking a bunch of redteam players to compliment one another on how gloriously blue and green and purple and pink each one of them is, when in reality red cannot be qualified in any real way as such, this delusional manner of flattery can only temporarily satisfy their shallow need for a short-term fix. They will require more and more and more of this fictitious praise from their own choir such as appears to be necessary for the likes of Presidents and Kings or Queens or Dignitaries who receive ‘praise’ from their very own subjects, instead of accepting their true mortal fallible monster nature, and then build upon this true yet unpleasant quality towards self-improvement. Sorta like starting a garden from a pile of fertile compost; know what I mean, Vern? You see, spoiled children want their dessert first, not the other way around — and if anyone tries to take that dessert away from them, they will sabotage the whole fucking meal, or (hopefully)… starve themselves to death.
For more super fun reading on this disturbing topic, just visit the following link: Abusive Narcissistic Psychopaths.
Have a good one folks!